le or la?

French gender is a constant headache for many students of French. Why is manteau masculine and montre feminine, when both men and women wear both of them? Le is for masculine nouns and la is for feminine nouns.
Why is it la beard? La beard is usually on le boys. Usually. It doesn't make sense that the beard gets a female gender.
Why is it le baby? If someone is having a baby, how do we know its already le and not la? Unless of course, you get an ultrasound and get to know beforehand.
Why is it le vegetables? Why are vegetables masculine? A bitter gourd definitely doesn't look male to me. Heck, none of the vegetables look masculine to me. They're just vegetables.

Here's a question: What would "the blog" be? Google Translator says its le blog. Well. I would like to call my blog la blog. Thank you very much. Call me feminist. Whatever.

Imagine if english had genders for non-living things as well...
I went to the market today. He was very crowded. I had to buy some vegetables. I bought some carrots, to try a new dish with her in it. He came out very well. After dinner, we sat and watched TV. She had become very old. We needed to get her exchanged in the market. But since he was crowded, we decided we'll keep her anyway. Tomorrow is a brand new day. I hope he will be good. He who? He, the day!

PS. I found the Gender Genie. Check it out. Its fun.